Tag Archives: Getting to Yes
Why it pays to have principles when negotiating
Recently I was facilitating a two-day negotiation skills program for one of our clients. During the afternoon on the first day, one of the participants asked me the following question: “Can I be a principled negotiator even if they’re not?” This is a great question and one I often get asked.
When we talk about principled negotiation with our clients, we’re talking about the principled negotiation method, described in Getting to Yes[1] as being based on four propositions:
- Separating people from the problem
- Focus on interests, not positions
- Seek options which create mutual gain
- Use objective standards
In responding to this question, I explained that the short answer is “yes” – you can still be highly effective as a principled negotiator even if the other party doesn’t adopt a similar approach. Why? Because being principled allows you to manage the process in a collaborative and therefore more persuasive way. Which means you’re more likely to achieve the outcome you’re looking for.
Here’s a summary of the advice I offered (and what we worked through as a group in detail):
Being principled allows you to respond effectively to negotiation challenges in the moment
Even if the other party uses dirty tactics such as emotional blackmail, demands or threats to try to persuade you, responding in a principled way will help you deal more effectively with any challenges if they arise.
For example, if someone is being positional and digs their heels in on a solution (e.g. “My final offer is $100,000. Take it or leave it!”), rather than react through instinct and throw a position right back (e.g. “Well, my best offer is $50,000!”), you can choose to separate the issue from the behaviour, and move the conversation towards standards.
You could draw on objective standards and ask them to explain the reasoning underpinning their offer (e.g. “On what basis have you calculated the offer of $100,000?”). In doing so, your purpose is to encourage them to reflect on whether their offer really is fair and reasonable in the circumstances. Ultimately, as a principled negotiator that’s what you want to achieve – a solution that is fair and reasonable in the circumstances and which doesn’t ‘screw’ the other party over. Why? Because you know that you may have to negotiate in the future either directly with this party, or with another party who may have heard about your approach to doing business and negotiating.
Reputations spread fast and if you take an unprincipled approach now and try to walk all over the other party, chances are you’ll find your future negotiations with this party – and possibly many others – will be a lot harder and more stressful than you would like!
Being principled during preparation can help improve your outcome, and encourages working toward mutual gains
By doing your preparation and considering both parties’ perspectives, you’ll enhance your ability to persuade the other party to agree to an outcome that works for both of you, rather than them focusing on a solution that only works for them.
Spending time thinking about the other party’s perspective before the negotiation and then conveying that understanding during the negotiation is a very powerful persuasive tool. When people feel listened to and understood, they are more likely to be open to hearing another’s perspective. This means you’re much more likely to be able to persuade them – which is the aim of a negotiation.
Remember: knowledge is power. So even if you’re counterpart doesn’t take a collaborative approach and consider what’s important to both of you, you can still prepare and negotiate in a principled way – and in doing so, increase your persuasive power!
Being principled allows you to lead by example
There’s no denying that our negotiations would be a whole lot easier and more efficient if everybody adopted a principled approach. The reality is though that many people still adopt the adversarial approach to negotiation and doing business (i.e. the tug-of-war model) which is premised on the understanding that for me to get more of something, you need to get less.
However, by being a principled negotiator even if the other party isn’t, you’ll be able to more effectively and efficiently manage the negotiation process, which will help you to achieve a better outcome – and you might even teach your counterpart how to be principled in the process!
All the best with your further negotiations.
Warm regards
Tyla Locke
Senior Consultant
[1] * Getting to Yes: How to Negotiate an Agreement without Giving In, by Roger Fisher, William L Ury and Bruce Patton, 1991.
Negotiation Skills Masterclass
Tagged in cma, Elaine Lin, Getting to Yes, negotiation skills
We’re excited to offer a brand new event as part of our public workwhop program: CMA’s Negotiation Skills Masterclass, running on Wednesday 29 June in Melbourne.
Facilitated by our Senior Consultant Elaine Lin, who brings expertise from teaching at Harvard Law School and its Program on Negotiation, our Negotiation Skills Masterclass is a unique learning experience that we’ve created specifically for our negotiation alumni.
The session is an intensive coaching and practical skills session, to support you in your journey towards even better outcomes and more powerful working relationships. And with the group capped at 12 participants, the session will be intimate and highly customised to your challenges, questions and needs.
As well as personal feedback and coaching during the workshop, we’ll send you a personalised DVD containing a copy of your negotiation afterwards, to continue your reflection and refinement.
There’s more info here, or you can register directly online.
Feel free to contact us for more details. We hope to see you there!
The CMA team.
Agents aren’t necessarily adversaries
Tagged in Getting to Yes, negotiation, Rebecca Stowe
CMA Senior Consultant Rebecca Stowe offers her advice in response to a recent query on a property purchase:
Q. I’m trying to purchase a house, which has been advertised as “private sale” by a real estate agent. The price the vendor has specified seems ambitious, and as a purchaser, I’m keen to pay as low a price as possible. While I know the agent’s priority is to represent the vendor’s interests, what can I do so that the agent will assist me in reaching an outcome I’ll be happy with?
Sometimes we make the incorrect assumption that agents are solely driven to represent and meet their client’s interests. Reality is, agents always have interests of their own, and in order for the agent to view your offer favourably and even support it, it’s critical you take into consideration the agent’s interests and the state of your relationship. If you want the agent to help you, you need to think about what you can do to help the agent as well.
Think about the agent’s interests
The agent needs to represent the interests of the client, but it doesn’t stop there. The agent will also have his own personal interests. Don’t assume that the only driver for the agent is high commission. The agent presumably has a strong interest in reputation and securing future clients too.
Put forward options that meet the agent’s interests
You may be looking to sell your house if you are going to purchase a new one. One option might be for you to offer a price for the house (in line with market value), and then incentivise the agent to influence the vendor to accept this offer by proposing that if the vendor accepts, you will commit to getting the agent to sell your house. You may also mention that you are regularly discussing property with friends and colleagues at work, and would be happy to recommend them as an agent.
Make sure your offer is justified with objective standards
While of course you’d like to get the lowest price possible, in order for the agent to take you seriously and to avoid damaging the relationship, it’s important you come up with a price that is fair and reasonable. You should do your research by looking at auction results from other similar properties in the area, as well as general trends in the market.
Building the relationship
The type of relationship you build with the agent will strongly influence whether they will want to work with you. Remember that all relationships are based on assumptions. Often we make assumptions that agents are the ‘enemy’ and are ‘untrustworthy’. These assumptions are likely to influence the way we communicate with the agent and may lead to a hostile and adversarial approach to negotiations, however the agent is likely to better respond if they know that you are trying to work with them.
Your behaviour will also influence the assumptions the agent is making about you, so be careful! Indicate a desire to work with the agent and set the tone for joint problem solving by demonstrating an understanding of all parties’ interests, and signalling a willingness to explore a range of options together. Help them understand that you are facing the issue together and are trying to come up with options that will meet as many of each party’s needs as possible.
So, next time you’re in negotiations with an agent, think broadly about ways to build a positive working relationship. Consider their interests and how you can create extra value for them, and meet more of your own interests in the process!
Good luck!
Rebecca Stowe
Senior Consultant
P.S. If you’re interested in improving your or your team’s negotiation skills, our next Getting to Yes course is running in Melbourne on Tuesday 21 & Wednesday 22 June. Register here or contact us for more details.
